The Big Leap
Breaking your upper limit
4 minutes of stillness
The Big Leap
As a child, my grandfather would call us every afternoon, asking how our day went. He always ended his calls with the same question: “Have you done your 15 minutes of reading today?”
That question drove me crazy until I decided to start lying just so he'd stop asking. The harsh truth was that I was never interested in reading.
It wasn’t until seven years after his death, during a retreat in Asia, that I met Bobby Castro. As he shared his story, I finally understood the transformative power of reading and how it shaped his journey towards building a billion-dollar company.
But even more significant was how reading influenced his self-awareness, his worldview, and his commitment to becoming a better human being.
I felt this realization as a bridge reconnecting me to my grandfather. Bonds never truly end; they only transform.
The retreat, called "A Journey to Peace," was guided by Geshe YongDong across Vietnam, Cambodia, and Thailand.
A deep depression had plunged me into one of the darkest chapters of my life.
But there, with no turning back, I decided to fully embrace vulnerability. I asked questions, took notes on everything that resonated, and experienced firsthand the power of opening up without knowing the outcome.
Alongside Geshe YongDong, I learned about:
Attachment.
Healing anger.
Changing perceptions.
Living in the present moment.
The power of mindful breathing.
This retreat—this powerful encounter with myself—was my first big leap.
When I returned, I made a promise to immerse myself in the world of reading. Eventually, "The Big Leap: A Guide to Transcending Personal Limits, Overcoming Fears, and Unleashing Your Authentic Greatness for a Better Life" by Gay Hendricks found its way into my hands.
No matter who you are, your credentials, or how impressive your achievements, we all have a glass ceiling blocking us from living in our zone of genius.
The upper limit problem restricts our growth through self-generated ceilings, crafted by our thoughts, beliefs, and values. What do I think about myself? What do I believe about myself? What do I truly value?
It’s purpose is to keep us emotionally comfortable and safe.
Human beings have an internal thermostat that regulates how much love, success, growth, creativity, fulfillment, and happiness we allow ourselves to feel.
We are born with our thermostats calibrated from 0 to 10. But the trap is that our personal history, inner narrative, and life experiences skew this thermostat as a defensive response to life’s threats.
What once felt like a 10 now becomes a 6. We live sleepwalking, experiencing life at an intensity far below its potential, firmly believing that a 6 is our new 10.
When we go from 6 to 7 or 8, we feel a rush of unfamiliar energy, novelty, and risk. Subconsciously, we sabotage ourselves, returning to our comfort zone—the safe, familiar place where we ironically never feel truly good.
If my thermostat's happiness level is at 6 out of 10, reaching 8 means I've broken through my upper limit.
Breaking through feels physiologically unfamiliar, and my subconscious detects this prolonged positivity as risky. It signals me that it’s time to return to my natural limit of 6 out of 10.
The descent takes many forms. For me, it manifests as relentless self-judgment about how I could improve this experience, how I could add more value, or with thoughts that sabotage the present moment.
As soon as judgment enters, conflict arises because judgment and joy cannot coexist. Judgment instantly restricts my ability to fully enjoy and savor the positive energy that shattered my upper limit.
The key is consciously and incrementally expanding our capacity to feel and enjoy the love, success, creativity, and value within us.
Small increments gradually raise our upper limit, recalibrating our internal thermostat and transforming our experience of life.
These increments trigger the internal voice that says, “You can’t feel this good. You’ve never felt so much love, enjoyed so much money, or experienced such inner abundance.”
This resistance is normal. That voice is fighting to pull us back to our comfort zone.
Gay Hendricks proposes overcoming the upper limit problem with a conscious leap that dismantles the structure supporting this self-imposed ceiling:
Incompetence: Activities that energetically cost us greatly. We’re not good at them, and others can do them better. We must stop doing them, delegate, or find creative ways to energize them.
Competence: Where most people operate—you're good at what you do, but so are others. Operating here will not bring anything extraordinary into your life.
Excellence: You’re almost a genius, performing brilliantly, financially comfortable, fulfilling basic needs (love, variety, security), but neglecting your soul’s needs (growth, contribution). This zone traps you, preventing the leap to genius.
Zone of Genius: Here you flow harmoniously with your calling, sharing the universe’s unique gifts through you. You transcend by meeting your needs for growth and contribution. It’s the only place where you authentically express your magic. You don’t hold back; your work doesn’t feel like work—you choose to play in the arena.
To transform our life experience, we must commit to redesigning our lives to spend as much time as possible in our zone of genius.
Making this commitment is the Big Leap: dedicating ourselves to paying the price without knowing its cost, trusting deeply that the journey will be worth it.
What do I love doing most that places me in a state of flow?
Which work never feels like work to me?
In my work, what produces the highest ratio of abundance and satisfaction relative to the time invested?
Identify when you’re in your zone of genius and serve others from there, knowing that you’re simultaneously serving yourself.
So… what’s your thermostat set to right now? And what would it mean to raise it, even just a little?
Something to think about…
“There's no such thing as a minor lapse of awareness. You're either present with what is--right here, right now--or you're someplace else.”
- Guy Hendricks
Founders: Haruki Murakami
Haruki Murakami's life exemplifies the profound connection between discipline and creativity.
Rising at 4 AM to write for 5-6 hours followed by a 10K run, he discovered that consistency and routine were the bedrock of his artistic journey. Through running, he found a meditative state that allowed his unconscious mind to flourish, describing it as a way to "acquire a void" and receive "valuable downloads from the unconscious".
His commitment to both writing and running demonstrates a deeper truth about mastery: it's not about sporadic bursts of inspiration but rather the relentless pursuit of one's craft.
I loved this sentence: "As soon as judgment enters, conflict arises because judgment and joy cannot coexist." I have never thought about this incompatibility, and it is so true! On the other hand, I am working to keep myself in my genius zone. It may not be easy, but it's worth it!